I hope all the mommy’s had a wonderful Mother’s Day! I got to sit down and visit with Mark and Charlie for a bit. I forgot just how much fun these two are! I’ve missed my boys, and Mark is one of my favorites. Anyway, I couldn’t wait to share this with you guys. We all know what a smartass Mark Dixon is … he reminds if just in case you forgot! Enjoy!
Three days ago was Mother’s Day. Three. Did the asshole remember? Nope. He was too busy working on some project with Jackson. I haven’t said a word though, because revenge is a dish I would prefer to watch him choke on.
There are literally three days out of the year that a man is supposed to remember. My birthday, Mother’s Day, and our anniversary … that’s it. Yet the genius can’t manage that. Why is this so difficult? It’s even on the damn calendar! My iPhone sent me a reminder, however, he was too worried about their boys’ weekend in Vegas. Assholes. I bet Jackson didn’t forget to get Catherine something. And I damn sure know Liam would never forget.
I got the defective one of the bunch. Lucky me.
Mark took Cullen and Makenna to the park since I was being “bitchy”. I’ll show him bitchy.
Eight minutes later, they burst through the door.
“Mommy!” Makenna comes running. Her blonde hair is plastered to the side of her face. “We got wet!”
“I see that,” I glare at Mark. When they left the house they were dry. “Why are you all soaked?” I look at Cullen who is in Mark’s arms as he drips all over the hardwood floor.
“Daddy took us swimming!” Cullen claps his hands.
Mark laughs and rubs the back of his head. “It was the funniest thing.” I have a feeling I’m not going to find it funny. “Cullen decided he wanted to feed the birds. So he ran toward them, which caused them to run toward the lake.”
“He followed after them. Which required me and Makenna to go in as well.”
I close my eyes and begin counting. It doesn’t help. “You’re the parent. You’re supposed to watch him. You know he’s a loose cannon!”
Everyone knows this. Cullen is a monster. A freaking adorable, smart, and devious creature sent to this earth to punish me.
“Yeah, but he’s fast,” Mark shrugs.
“You’re the Navy SEAL. Mr. I’m-such-a-badass-just-ask-me couldn’t outrun a six-year-old?” Unreal. This is what I married.
He puts a very soaked Cullen on the floor. Mark’s feet move forward as he stalks closer. I put my hands up, “I am fast.”
“Mark,” I warn. “I swear to God.”
He continues to close in. “I just want to hug my wife.”
“Don’t you love me?”
“Not right now,” I step backwards, trying to retreat. “Go get a towel.”
His smirk spreads into shit-eating grin. “I’m cold. Hold me.”
I hit the wall and he lunges. “Mark!” I scream as I dodge to the right, but his arms wrap around my waist, hoisting me against his cold, wet body. I wiggle and fight to get free. “I’m gonna kill you!” His strong grip keeps me in place as he nuzzles my back, soaking every inch of us that is connected.
“You can try,” his deep laugh echoes in the room. The kids both laugh as they drench my once clean floors. “Get Mommy!” He yells he brings me to the ground.
They jump on top of me, ensuring no part of me is unscathed. The laugh that escapes me fills the room. The kids, and my very large man-child find this entertaining. I squirm and giggle as Mark sits on my legs, and they bounce on my back.
“Okay,” he finally says. “That’s enough.” He pulls them both up into his arms.
Makenna dangles upside down, so I grab her. “Let’s get them cleaned up.”
I grumble under my breath about husbands as I get her in the bath. “When you get older, pick a doctor or a lawyer,” I tell her. “Men like your daddy will only make you lose your mind.” She doesn’t get what I’m saying, but I feel better giving her some advice. “And they’ll forget special days like Mother’s Day. It’s okay though. Mommy is going to get a few presents with Daddy’s American Express card. Which will make it all better. Can you say Louis Vuitton?” I kiss her nose.
Once we’re all cleaned up, I head down to see the mess. Mark is on his hands and knees cleaning it up. “Sorry, baby.”
“For what?” I ask as I crouch down to help.
Maybe he finally remembered …
“Making a mess.”
“What else is new?” I know it’s just one day and I’m being really petulant. But being a mom was never something I had anticipated. It’s nice to be appreciated once a year. I don’t need gifts or fancy dinners. I only wanted a card.
“Are you on your rag?”
I stop moving and scowl at him. “Are you serious?”
“It would explain the mood,” he shakes his head.
There are a few times that my training comes in handy, this is one. The fact that I don’t beat the ever loving shit out of him is a testament of my patience. I do, however, take the towel and throw it in his face. I stand with my finger pointing in his face. “It’ll be a long time before you’ll see my vagina again. Maybe never. This cycle is going to last forever.”
“Charlie,” he whines. “I was kidding.”
“Maybe I am, maybe I’m not. You’ll figure it out soon enough.”
A few hours later of me ignoring him and dealing with the kids, I head into my office. While it’s not outfitted with as many gadgets as I once had, it’s enough to keep me happy. I’ve been consulting with another agency, and Mandi has been trying to convince me to return to the agency on a case-by-case basis. I’ll think about it, but then I see the photo of my two babies smiling at me. The idea of not being here to watch them grow is enough to keep me here.
There are many women who do it, and I never figured I’d be one of the few who can’t. But I am.
“Mommy,” Makenna knocks on the door.
“Yes, baby,” I turn and see her with her hand behind her back.
“Daddy said he loves you,” she shifts forward and hands me something before running off.
I look at the item in my hand. A flowered out tampon.
He’s going to die. My children will have to endure the loss of their father because he’s going to meet God. Since he’s a minister … he should be comfortable with this.
I stand, but before I get far, Cullen runs in. “Here!” He throws four of them at me, then exits.
Makenna returns with a huge smile and chocolate on her face. “They’re flowers, Mommy!” She hands me another five tampon flowers.
“Mark Dixon!” I scream, feeling the heat spread across my face.
Cullen peeks his head over again, hides, then puts his hand out with tampons literally looking like a bouquet.
I walk over, take them from my innocent son, and march out the door. He better be hiding.
This is one of those times where I’m not sure to laugh or kick him in the balls. Who the hell makes their kids bring you a bouquet of Tampax? My husband. That’s who.
I turn the corner to find him standing in front of the table with a mischievous grin. “You’re fucking hilarious.”
“I think I am,” he winks.
“I assure you, you’re not.”
He steps closer, “I figured you needed them.”
“You need to step back before you find yourself missing a piece of anatomy I happen to like,” my voice is low and full of promise.
“I didn’t forget, baby.”
Mark’s eyes lock on mine as his words seep through. What alternate universe is he living in? Of course he forgot. Mother’s Day was three days ago and not even a card. Hell, he didn’t even acknowledge it. “You really are old.”
“Not funny,” he deadpans. “I didn’t forget. I just didn’t have your gift. I wanted the day to be special.”
“Special equals tampon flowers?”
His body presses against mine as he hooks his arms around me. “No, my love.” Mark’s lips touch my nose. “Go look outside.”
I don’t know what he’s up to. He releases me and then swats my butt. Jerk. I open the front door and see the car I’ve been eyeing for months. I couldn’t justify spending the money when my car was perfectly fine, but he knows me.
“Happy Mother’s Day my giant pain in the ass wife,” he says as he leans against the wall.
He really outdid himself. I smile and leap into his arms. He falls back a little, but holds me up. “I love you.”
“I’m pretty lovable.”
I roll my eyes and shake my head. “I think I’ll keep you.”
His lips touch mine as he presses me against the wall. He kisses me with so much passion I could burst. That’s the one thing we’ve never lacked, and I’m grateful that two kids later it hasn’t ebbed. Mark is sexy even when he’s not trying. I love him more than I can express and he loves me more than I deserve.
He gets my crazy.
I get his arrogance.
But it works for us.
One thing I know for certain. There’s no one else I want to spend the rest of my life with. Even if he drives me insane.
Mark breaks the kiss and I realize we have an audience.
Cullen and Makenna stand there with mixed emotions splayed across their face. His is a look of horror and hers is curious.
“And that is how you do CPR,” he says with a nod.
I burst out laughing. “I’m sure we’ll practice again tonight.”
He wiggles his brows. “I think you need to practice some blowing a balloon.”
This is us. Sexual innuendoes in front of our kids.
And I wouldn’t have it any other way.